{"id":286,"date":"2020-07-14T14:45:53","date_gmt":"2020-07-14T14:45:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/?p=286"},"modified":"2020-07-14T14:45:55","modified_gmt":"2020-07-14T14:45:55","slug":"percival-the-triple-threat-elk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/2020\/07\/14\/percival-the-triple-threat-elk\/","title":{"rendered":"Percival, the Triple-Threat Elk"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

One day at the Rocky Mountain National Park, I met an elk. He was standing no more than 20 feet off the gravel trail. I looked at the elk. The elk looked at me. He became fixated on the camera hanging around my neck.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou gonna take my picture?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was stunned. \u201cOh, my God! A talking elk.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right,\u201d he said. \u201cName is Percival. I\u2019m a 10-point bull elk, not a scratch on me. It\u2019s generally accepted that I\u2019m the best-looking elk from here to Telluride.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cPercival, I definitely would like to take a few photos of you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He looked off to the distance, and I took several photos.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"All
How do you do?<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThe lighting and the mountains in the backdrop are perfect!\u201d I said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cThank you. I scouted this location myself,\u201d he said. \u201cWould you mind sending those to me? I need some new headshots for my portfolio. I don\u2019t have any money but I could send you a few bucks. Ha-ha. A deer joke.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I agreed, and Percival expressed his preference for receiving them on a thumb drive even though he had no thumbs. Or to post them on my blog.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
So dramatic. “I need an agent.”<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWait! Wait! Let me turn so you can get my best side. How\u2019s this? Dramatic, huh! I tell you, I could take Hollywood by storm if I only had an agent. Hey, are you an agent? Naw, I didn\u2019t think so. You don\u2019t look the type. Here, get this one \u2013 my badass mean elk face. Throughout the high country, they call me a triple threat. I got the looks, I can sing and I can dance.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Badass elk.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

He proceeded to sing, which was more like yodeling. Still, impressive for an elk. Then he did a soft shoe on the tundra, followed by a polka. No lie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Hoofing on the tundra. A little soft shoe.<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI tell jokes, too,\u201d Percival said. Without hesitation he launched into one.
\u201cTwo hunters are sitting at a bar. One says, \u2018Did you know that some elks have sex 10 or 15 times a night?\u2019 The second hunter gets all irritated. \u2018Dammit,\u2019 he says. \u2018I just joined the VFW.\u2019\u201d He chortled.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"
Elk yodeling is an acquired taste. <\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cWhat I really need is a video,\u201d he said. \u201cAll I\u2019ve got is some aerial T&C video from last year. Tracking and Counting by the park service. Amateurs. You can\u2019t even tell it\u2019s me.\u201d He asked me to take a few clich\u00e9 shots of him eating and looking wistfully into the distance. \u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Percival, the triple-threat elk, good luck with that agent thing. No doubt, Hollywood will be calling.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One day at the Rocky Mountain National Park, I met an elk. He was standing<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":287,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,27],"tags":[58,57],"class_list":["post-286","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-inspiration","category-nature","tag-hollywood","tag-spoof"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/286","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=286"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/286\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":293,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/286\/revisions\/293"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/287"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=286"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=286"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/adventureaday.blog\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=286"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}